a bleeding heart, part 11

"Oh, well, I'll probably just have some french toast. I'm not that hungry."

A part of her knew she should probably eat a decent meal since she had a hangover but right now Lilly couldn't care less. She shouldn't have kissed him, or gone to him on the couch. Maybe she should have waited until he kissed her but she had been and still was terrified he never would kiss her. That he never wanted her the way she wanted him. Perhaps it would just be best if she left and found somewhere to call home for a bit? There was that saying that absense makes the heart grow fonder. There had to be some truth in it if the saying had lasted through so many centuries. Running a hand through her blonde hair she slowly stood up. Brayden probably didn't want to hear her worries, or what was troubling her. On one hand she knew drowning herself in alcohol wouldn't help but on the other hand it did numb the pain and right now that sounded like the best thing in the world.

"Actually, I think I'm just going to head out and leave you in peace."

Lilly spoke quietly as she stood up. If she remembered right Lilly had actually left behind some clothes here a couple months ago when they had a friendly sleepover. She had worked late, and Brayden had been nice enough to pick her up from the cafe. That had led to her falling asleep in his car so he had ended up taking her back to his place. She left the living room, went back to Brayden's room, and sure enough found her bag on the top of a chest where she had left her clothes. Stripping off she took a quick shower first before putting on the fresh underwear, faded blue skin tight jeans, and a white halter top. Drying her hair she ran a brush through it quickly before putting it up in a high ponytail. Grabbing the pair of white flip flops from the bag she then put her dirty clothes into the bag before heading downstairs again, entering the living room.

When Brayden mentioned she had been crying she bit her bottom lip. What was she supposed to say? The truth? He probably didn't want to hear it. Noticing him looking her in the eye she sighed softly as she walked over to the couch before sitting down where she had been sitting. Maybe she should just be honest. He'd know if she was lieing anyway. A part of her thought that maybe if she just kissed him again that she wouldn't have to say anything but what if he didn't kiss her back again? She couldn't feel that again. It was bad enough now. Inhaling a deep breath she lifted her head a bit before turning to look at Brayden. This was going to hurt wasn't it?

"Yes, I was crying. I thought... I thought last night you said you wanted me but I must have been wrong because as soon as I laid on you, you slid out from under me and left the house."